I’m going to try to fool you into believing I’m a natural public speaker, but in case I don’t: I wrote it down….
Two days ago, when I finished writing this speech, a friend critiqued it and gave me some advice. First, she said I shouldn’t forget to introduce myself. Second, that it needed more Craig Olson. It was good advice, so I’ll start by saying who I am and how I know this guy.
My name is Trevor, and Craig and I grew up together in a small Nebraskan town called Wayne, population 5,000. Throughout our childhood we were on the same tee-ball, baseball, football, dodgeball, four square, badminton, and basketball teams; basically, our friendship was a series of winning seasons. I remember in high school, after losing to a rival basketball team, Craig once admitted that he could play in the NBA…if he wanted to, as if it was a casual thing. I wondered why his superstardom didn’t show up that Friday night, but I didn’t say anything: I was just happy my friend was a first-round draft pick.
Later college came, and we floated to different parts of the world, always maintaining contact…despite Craig’s fanatical hate of Facebook.
When Craig and Bridget asked me to speak at their wedding I was living in Brazil, and they were living in New Zealand. Though strangers in strange lands we felt at home in our respective countries, and it was this Oregon wedding that seemed like a foreign, far-away thing.
It seemed so far away, in fact, that I forget all about this speech until another e-mail popped into my inbox, this time from Bridget.
Bridget and I had never met in person, never even talked on the phone, but I liked her writing style. It was personable, with obvious intelligence in how she expressed herself. But…with just weeks before her white wedding I knew there was something more serious beneath her electronic hello. Actually, you know what, I’ll just paraphrase how I interpreted her e-mail.
“Hey Trevor, hope you’re having a great time in South America. Just a heads up: we’re printing our programs with your name on them. Yeah, you’re in this for real. And you better be good. Don’t. Ruin. My. Wedding. Can’t wait to meet you!”
I responded the way anyone would who is about to meet their friend’s future wife for the first time: I lied, said everything was fine, great, that I had tons of wise words to say about love.
The truth was more interesting…but I didn’t want to scare Bridget. I didn’t mention that I was betting I could make connecting flights from Paraguay to the United States with an unofficial visa; that I owned no dress clothes and had forgotten how to tie a tie; and that until two days ago the comical and entertaining speech about love I had promised was actually just twelve lines of bad poetry.
I needed inspiration, fast.
That’s when I turned to Craig and Bridget’s travel blog. The photos of the two swimming with bottle-nosed dolphins in New Zealand, cuddling kangaroos in Australia, riding elephants in Thailand, and strolling cherry blossoms near an ancient Japanese temple were more than enough material for a ten minute speech.
There was one photo in particular, in Japan, that summed up everything I wanted to say about love.
Craig and Bridget had traveled to the mountains outside Tokyo to stay in a Japanese inn. The inn was divided into two sections: one modern according to Western standards; the other traditional, simpler, with reed floor mats and hot springs trickling outside its thin paper doors. At opposite ends of a low-lying table Craig and Bridget sat cross-legged on the floor, dressed in cotton robes called “yutakas.”
A lamp on the table threw off orange light and Craig and Bridget were glowing, not just from the light but from happiness, as if in that moment they understood the ridiculousness of the world and how lucky they were to find each other in it. And most importantly: they were smiling big child-like goofy smiles as they discovered this. Just like they are now.
This photo reassured me for several reasons. One, it gave me some speech material. And two, it clearly showed Craig and Bridget weren’t playing at love, but were actually in love. Though they were dressed up and out of their element, it wasn’t an invented moment, but a snapshot of a real connection that will grow more meaningful with time, no matter where they find themselves in the world.
Craig and Bridget’s travel blog is called, “Next Stop Somewhere Else.” I also thought this an appropriate name for their new life together. Just as I began this speech with a simple introduction I’d like to end with a simple message for my old friend, Craig, and my new friend, Bridget: remember this wedding is not the end of an adventure, it’s the beginning of new adventures together. Remember that and you’ll always have beautiful photos and memories to look back on.
And with that, I’d like to make a toast to Craig and Bridget. To love, and to adventures together.
LOCATION: Portland, Oregon – My friend Craig asked me to prepare a speech for his wedding. The priest began the ceremony with a few words, then called me to the pulpit. Somehow it slipped my mind that I’d speak during the actual wedding, not at the reception, which made me a little self-conscious about this goofy bestman-type speech.
